The Dawn Treaders

A sermon about The High Road of Love, Sex, and Marriage

May 13, 1990

Ephesians 4:29 - 5:10 Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment, that it may give grace to those who hear. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption.

Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. AND BE KIND TO ONE ANOTHER, TENDER-HEARTED, FORGIVING EACH OTHER, JUST AS GOD IN CHRIST ALSO HAS FORGIVEN YOU.

Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children; and walk in love, just as Christ gave Himself up for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God as a fragrant aroma.

But do not let immorality or any impurity or greed even be named among you, as is proper among saints; and there must be no filthiness and silly talk, or coarse jesting, which are not fitting, but rather giving of thanks.

For this you know with certainty, that no immoral or impure person or covetous man, who is an idolater, has an inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and God.

Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of these things the wrath of God comes upon the sons of disobedience.

Therefore do not be partakers with them; for you were formerly darkness, but now you are light in the Lord; walk as children of light (for the fruit of the light consists in all goodness and righteousness and truth) trying to learn what is pleasing to the Lord.

Introduction: Ephesians 4 is one of the Golden Chapters of the Bible:

I. CHRISTIANS IN RELATIONSHIP

  1. After statements of lofty principle we come to PRACTICAL GUIDELINES FOR LOVING CHRISTIAN CONDUCT. Our speech is to be uplifting (edification .. giving grace to those who hear). Our attitude is to be that of kindness and forgiveness, not bitter or angry. Our actions are to be gentle and Christlike.
  2. The key to Christian conduct is A PERSONAL CONTACT WITH GOD:(1) Do not grieve the Holy Spirit (4:30); (2) Do be forgiving as God in Christ has forgiven you (4:32); and (3) Do be imitators of God the Father (5:1), as His dear children.

II. DANGERS OF BEING DECEIVED

  1. These instructions are more than just suggestions. They have clear prohibitions attached as well:

    (From the text, 5:3-5) But do not let immorality or any impurity or greed even be named among you, as is proper among saints; and there must be no filthiness and silly talk, or coarse jesting, which are not fitting, but rather giving of thanks. For this you know with certainty, that no immoral or impure person or covetous man, who is an idolater, has an inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and God. That is clear enough.

  2. To be engaged in on-going breaking of these prohibitions is to sever oneself from inheritance in the kingdom of God, along with the clear warning of (5:6): Let no one deceive you with vain words, for because of these things the wrath of God comes upon the sons of disobedience. God expects His children to be different from people who disregard His clear teachings. God wants His children to "walk as children of light!" We are to be Dawn Treaders!

III. CHALLENGES TO ACCEPTED TEACHING

  1. A. Christians who are serious about following Jesus Christ must brace for THE CHALLENGE OF OUR POST-CHRISTIAN ERA. The "capital" of assumed piety left over from the simpler days of the McGuffey Reader has all been used up long ago.

    We cannot depend on government or on public opinion. We may well see a revival of religious fervor in our time that does NOT include Christian faith. For Christian faith is not compatible with other religions. We must seek to be as loving and acceptant as Jesus Himself, while at the same time truly heed what He said: I AM the Way, the Truth and the Life. No one comes to the Father except by Me.

  2. B. EVERY TENET OF OUR FAITH IS BEING CALLED INTO QUESTION. To say that we accept Bible teaching as a standard for living is to come first into ridicule and then into violent opposition. THIS IS ESPECIALLY TRUE IN WHAT WAS ONCE THE VERY HUSH-HUSH REALM OF HUMAN SEXUALITY.
  3. C. SEX HAS not only come out of the closet, it has in many regards TAKEN CENTER STAGE IN THE ARENAS OF LIFE. When I began my ministry IN 1956, in keeping with the mores of the culture to which I ministered, I probably would not have used the word "sex" in a sermon. It is very difficult for us to grasp just how far we have come in down many roads in 36 years.

    [It seems almost silly that there was a flap over the use of the phrase, "I don't give a damn" in a major movie. Now, so far as I can discern, there is no garbage too filthy to be spoken and shown from movie screens or theater productions and the like.

  4. D. Particularly, THE PREVIOUSLY ACCEPTED CONCEPT OF SEX BEING SANCTIONED ONLY IN THE CONTEXT OF THE MARRIAGE OF ONE MAN TO ONE WOMAN IS UNDER SERIOUS ATTACK.
    1. 1. Popular magazines and television sit-coms alike glamorize adultery, premarital sex, and all the things we used to call sin and perversion.
    2. 2. The word homophobia is now being used as a bludgeon to attack anyone who disagrees with liberal lobbies. Until 1973 the American Psychiatric Association officially regarded homosexuality as a condition to be treated, an abnormality. How the American Psychiatric Association was "lobbied" is a matter of public record. Now anyone who disagrees with the idea that homosexuality is a normal, acceptable "alternative lifestyle" is accused of homophobia.

      [Perhaps we ought to push a new word: homophobia-phobia. The fear of speaking the truth on any sexual matter because of fear of the opposition we will surely face. Before we were attacked with homophobia-phobia it was possible to be discuss and disagree without being considered hateful to individuals. Now all Bible- guided Christians are "bigots" and "fundamentalists" and worse.]

    3. 3. A great deal is assumed about sex. To see things in the media— TV or the printed page— makes it easy to assume that what is shown or printed is the "norm." We should have enough sense to realize that just because TV makes people look happy and attractive doesn't make it so. Too much of our thinking is shaped by too few unregenerate people.

      [Kinsey is NOT the final authority on sexuality, the Bible IS: [Paul Gebhard and Alan B. Johnson, in a book called, The Kinsey Data, say that Kinsey used a very large number of prisoners in his data. Abraham Maslow is quoted as saying to Kinsey that his volunteers were not representative of society. I believe Kinsey gives a distorted view of American sexual behavior and belief.]

    4. 4. We must know what we believe and not be timid about teaching it to our children. The air-headed idea that children should wait until they are 18 to decide what and whom to worship and believe would be silly if the world were a spiritual vacuum, which it most definitely is NOT. If we do not know Christ ourselves, AND IF WE DO NOT INTRODUCE OUR CHILDREN TO JESUS, we will lose our children, and we won't need to wait to die to go to hell.

      Already in some public schools there is mandatory sexual education where it is taught that homosexuality is a normal and even desirable appetite. [I cite Congressman William Dannemeyer, from California, who has written a book, Shadow in the Land, printed by the respected Ignatius Press, a Roman Catholic book house. Congressman Dannemeyer has been under attack himself as being "obsessed with attacking homosexuals." Just this week the Globe ran a prominent article, largely pejorative, with lengthy quotes from spokesmen for gay and lesbian organizations.

      Our old, accepted, scriptural values are under attack, make no doubt about it!

IV. CALL TO CHRIST-CENTERED LOVING [Conclusion:]

  1. WE CAN HAVE CLEAR TEACHING ON LOVE, SEX, AND THE FAMILY OF GOD, if we are prepared to live in a God-centered world and reject the me-ism that is glamorized in every public medium of communication. If we will accept the Bible as God's Word, we can find sound instruction as to how to live in these troubled times.
  2. THAT TEACHING INCLUDES CLEAR PROHIBITIONS: NO sex outside marriage, and such sex is always sin, no matter how right it "feels." There are names for sex outside of marriage— ugly names that have been mostly forgotten. In this day of explicit and graphic realism we need to say those names: sex before marriage is fornication; sex by a married person with anyone other than husband or wife is adultery; sex with members of the same sex is sodomy.
  3. SEX AND MARRIAGE ARE NOT THE SAME. The symbol or token of God's dealings with His beloved people all through the Bible is not just sex, but the intimacy of marriage. God loves His people with an intimacy that has covenant commitment. The Church is the Bride of Christ, and she must be true to Him. Each Christian is committed, married to God, and TO BE FAITHLESS TO GOD IS TO COMMIT SPIRITUAL ADULTERY.
  4. Marriage is based on these four things: (1) promise. (2) exclusivity. (3) gender. "For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and cleave unto his wife, and they two shall be one." (4) permanence. "Until death do us part." Only as these vows be held as sacred, and as the Church and the community at large keep these uncompromisingly as the foundation for Christian marriage can society abide.
  5. But to save ourselves, and to live clean in a fallen world is not (quite) an end to our Christian responsibility in this matter of love, sex, and marriage:

    WE ARE TO SEEK TO BE A REDEMPTIVE FORCE IN A FALLEN WORLD. We cannot simply ask God to help us keep our skirts clean and silently hope that the wicked world will hurry up and leap into hell. For as a matter of fact, people who are wrestling with these issues are our own loved ones.

    HOW ARE WE TO THINK ABOUT "HOMOSEXUALS?" Is it wishful thinking to say that we can and must distinguish between the person and the things a person may do?

    We must hold out the hand of fellowship to homosexuals, but we cannot compromise in our condemnation of all homosexual acts. There is a critical distinction between these two things.

  6. WE ARE ALL CALLED TO BE GOD'S DEAR CHILDREN, "CHILDREN OF LIGHT," DAWN TREADERS! We must first be pure ourselves, and then we can help our society in its deep need.

    If you are in a sexual affair— whether adulterous or fornication or homosexual— it cannot end except badly, with people getting hurt.

    But BY GOD'S GRACE YOU CAN BE HELPED, you can do the right thing, YOU CAN BE RIGHT WITH GOD! I am not preaching a simplistic, "easy believe-ism," but I am confident that God is able to clean you up, inside and out.

Our text says, in part: Therefore do not be partakers with them; FOR YOU WERE FORMERLY DARKNESS, but now you are light in the Lord; walk as children of light ! (5:8)

Listen to this (a similar) passage from I Corinthians 6: (9- 11) "Do you not know that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived; neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate [margin: effeminate by perversion], nor homosexuals, nor thieves, nor the covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers, shall inherit the kingdom of God.

"AND SUCH WERE SOME OF YOU; but you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ, and in the Spirit of our God."

Every one of us here has done things in the past for which we are ashamed. We are sinners by birth, and have been sinners by choice. But we are called to walk with God. We are called to holiness for that very purpose- to walk with a loving God in covenant relationship. As a people, and each one in our own lives- - let us heed that call.

Shall we pray.